We got down from the car to inquire what it was that was causing the hullabaloo. My two-year-old daughter was still asleep in the back seat. The gruesome scene sent a chill down my spine and blood stirred up in my stomach. We proceeded with our journey but my husband kept silent. I was still thinking of the scene and reminding myself of the faces of the mother and the daughter. Poor souls!
'The blood's still wet," I told my husband closely looking at the accident scene.
"Yes, it must have happened an hour ago," David, my husband, said.
The scene was very gory to look at. The person at the wheel must be in his early 30s who lay with his head smashed. The flesh came out terribly and there was blood all over his face. The blood was flowing on the road on all sides. On the other side of the car a woman who must be in her late twenties with her daughter lay on the road, dead. The woman was facing the sky while the small kid was still clutching her mother sleeping on her chest. The woman's head hit the road and she died instantly. But, the faces of the mother and the daughter looked serene as if they were still in their sleep. Blood was oozing out of the woman's head.
My husband and I were returning in our newly bought car from our pilgrimage. As we were on the outskirts of the town, we were forced to stop as a result of the commotion. We got down inquiring what it was that was causing the hullabaloo. My two-year-old daughter was still asleep in the back seat. The deceased couple brought tears to my eyes. The scene sent a chill down my spine and the sight of the blood stirred up my stomach terribly.
As we proceeded with our journey, my husband kept silent as I was still thinking of the scene and reminding myself of the faces of the mother and the daughter. Perhaps, David must also be pondering over the same.
Unable to bear the silence, I broke out, "Poor souls. We should avoid travelling by night David."
"You are right Grace. I was just thinking about the same. In the wee hours, the drivers will be sleepy and though we are alert, we cannot escape the pangs of fate. God is great, we are fortunate today," he said.
I could guess how shaken my husband was by the accident. It stirred strange and treacherous thoughts.
For long the scene kept haunting me and even the word "blood" sent a chill down my spine. A peculiar fear enveloped me night and day and for days on end the scene kept haunting me.
I am a god-fearing woman and was blessed with a daughter. I am dark in complexion but good to look at. My husband David works in a private bank while I am a sub-registrar in a government office. I work in a remote place. There are hardly five people in the office I work.
One day, I was trying to share my experience of the road accident with a computer operator at the office.
Interrupting me, he said he had read it in the newspaper about the young couple and their kid who died in the accident. A software engineer who has just acquired a new car was coming home to meet his parents and share his joy with them.
Unfortunately, he never reached them. "Oh! Did you see that accident?" asked the operator.
"Yes, I saw them. It was a horrible accident that claimed the entire family. The shiver is still to go from my body," I said.
Suddenly came my office boy Afzal shouting "So many people get killed in road accidents every day. What is so great in this madam. You should try to forget it."
His remarks irked me. "You heartless fellow?" I shouted at him.
"You are wrong madam. What if I feel sad about the deceased? Will they come alive? So we should try to forget it," he replied promptly.
I was not convinced with his self-made philosophy. He is a rude fellow who scares everyone coming to our office, I thought. He creates unnecessary worry and then fleeces money from them. There is nothing great about taking bribes in a government office, of course. A part of what is collected by Afzal comes to me too as my share. So, even if I do not like his behaviour, I keep silent most of the time as my colleagues do.
But, this time, his remarks made me angry indeed. How can a fellow remain so unsympathetic?
I was amazed at myself. Why was it impossible to forget the scene? It continued to haunt me even after a month had passed by? How come Afzal took it so easy? Can people really be so insensitive? Is he accustomed to experincing such things?
The next day in office, Afzal was having an argument with a visitor a young man neatly dressed who looked like an educated man. He was angrily asking the attender "Why should I pay extra money. What great job did you do apart from your duty?"
Afzal shouted back "See sir, if you can give the money, do it. If not, keep silent. Do not lecture us. Come tomorrow and take your papers."
I knew for certain, that man couldn't get the papers that easy. It was the way things worked here. But, I decided not to interfere. I did not even ask as to what has happened. It was a routine that people kept arguing with the employees here.
Next day, when that man came, Afzal remained indifferent. The visitor looked at me and tried to say something. I did not even turn my head else I had to take his side in the tussle.
Suddenly, the man began shouting. "You cheat! Are you doing any social service here that you demand extra money. Do you know how much I toil to earn that extra money you are asking for? I boil my blood and sweat out night and day to earn those few rupees. I cannot beg like you spineless bastards. A prostitute is better than you as she gives her blood and flesh to earn her bread. Are you not ashamed of pilfering money out of innocent people?”
Staring at me, that man exclaimed "you shameless creature. Do you feed your children with the same money'? To hell with you," he shouted and walked away.
Everybody in the office was panic stricken at the sudden outburst of the visitor. I was terribly shocked.
His words kept ringing in my ears. It somehow reminded me of the accident scene and an endless row of unwanted memories. However, travelling back home in the evening, I tried best to console myself and forget everything.
At home, I was about to feed my two-year-old daughter curd rice. I held my daughter in my right arm seated around my waist while preparing curd and rice with my right hand. With a morsel in hand, I walked onto the terrace and tried to help my kid eat. As my daughter craned her neck forward, I suddenly saw blood in my hand and my kid was about to grab it with her mouth wide open. In a jerk, I freed myself and dropped my daughter and the lump.
My daughter fell onto the ground, yelled loudly and suddenly burst into tears. My husband who was reading the newspaper rushed out in confusion to see what has happened. He saw me sweating profusely and in a trance. Lifting the kid, he came towards me asking "What happened Grace?” He kept repeating the question patting me.
Coming to my senses, I tried to get back to normal.
"No, the child slipped," I said shivering a little.
But, he appeared unconvinced. I recollected accurately the face of the person who came to my office in the morning and tried to recollect his
anguish.
I applied for a long leave and a transfer without delay. I decided never to touch a rupee without shedding my own blood and tried my best to escape from my past follies.
Ends/
Published in the statesman 10.02.08.
No comments:
Post a Comment